A reader contacted me with a question about competition. I read all of the articles on this site and I’ve just downloaded the free e-book and I’m about to read and listen to it, too. But I have one final question: If I’m in charge of my life then what about competition? I mean, I believe we are who we think we are, most of the time. If I consider myself a total winner and I do my best, I should win every time without fail. But on other hand, if I accept the idea that others are just as powerful as I am, can they control or affect my life? Can they actually block me from winning? With this kind of belief, human beings can’t be friends while in competition.

For example I want to win and be number one and some other guy just like me is up against me. I prepare myself and so does he – but we can’t both win, so the outcome can’t be achieved for both of us. This is a simple example, but I can only win or achieve great things in my life if I believe the whole universe belongs to me and if so, if I get something that someone else also wanted, should I feel guilty? Or should I believe that there is no observer or soul besides me? And again, if I follow this belief, then should there be separate worlds for every single man and woman?

I thought this excellent question was something that a lot of people might wonder about, and therefore, deserved its own blog post.

First, let’s look at the whole concept of competition. Our need to compete comes from the belief that there’s a limited amount of resources, and every time someone else gets some, it leaves less for us. It’s the belief that in order for us to win, someone else must lose. But this isn’t in line with who we really are. There’s not a finite pool of energy from which we can create. Our creative energy (and remember, everything is energy) is unlimited and expanding all the time. As we raise our vibration and remember who we really are, competition as we know it becomes less and less important.

Generally when we want to win at something, it’s rarely the competition that’s truly important to us. There’s usually a deeper reason. Perhaps we want recognition or praise, or we want to feel superior to others. Often, there’s a feeling of inadequacy at the root. Instead of focusing on winning, it’s really beneficial to focus on what you really want and let the Universe bring it to you in the best possible way. That may be winning the race, or it may be something even better.

If winning the race isn’t the best possible way, you may well be lined up with what you really want, but lose the race. If you were absolutely set on winning, you might feel disappointed and see it as a sign that things aren’t working out for you. But you’d be wrong. This is why we shouldn’t get too attached to HOW the Universe brings us what we want. When we don’t get what we want in the way that we thought we should, we actually begin to push what we want away by being disappointed and thinking that it’s not coming to us.

This doesn’t mean that you should feel guilty for winning or for even wanting to win. You are supposed to feel good, and feeling guilty is not good. But it does mean that you might want to evaluate what it is that you’re really seeking to gain. What does winning feel like? What does it give you? Answer these questions and you’ll have taken another step towards joy. This will also help you to stay friends with people you’re in competition with – you will know what it is that you’re really after, which will make you take the competition much less seriously.  After all, you can get what you want in an infinite number of ways. You don’t HAVE TO win the competition. It’s just one way that the Universe can bring you what you want (and quite possibly not even the best way). There are many, many others. So you no longer have to feel that your opponent took away this thing you really wanted by winning the competition.

But what if you’re truly lined up with winning and so is your opponent? The Universe will orchestrate it so you both win. How? Think of it this way: In any given moment, there are an infinite amount of possibilities in which that moment can play out. Your soul is experiencing all of them. You are living every possibility of every moment. And so is everyone else. Which possibility you consciously line up with is up to you. You think that you are experiencing the only reality, but you’re not. It’s just one of many. And this is why you can line up with your version of reality and it will seem real to you and your opponent can line up with his version. In your version, your opponent was not lined up with winning, but there’s a version of him in the Universe, that was. And we can skip from one version to another in an instant. All we have to do is line up with the frequency of it. (Read the free e-book to learn how).

I’m not saying that all competition is bad. It’s just based on an antiquated belief that we, as a human race, are slowly moving out of as our collective vibration raises. The truth is, we can all win, every time. We can all get what we really want, without any need to diminish anyone else. Our resources are truly endless, as long as we realize just how powerful we really are.

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  • melody..im still not too clear about this..does this mean that if i enter a competition and lose, its not to do with the winners talent? ..and only to do with my mentality?

    • Hey Mopey,

      If you enter a competition and lose, then how that loss feels to you is your manifestation. You could lose and not care, or you could lose and feel happy for the winner and that you had a great time, or you can lose and feel awful. The better you feel, the more you’ll line up with experiences that will feel that way. Over time, that will mean winning more and more, since that feels good. So yes, if you lose, that manifestation is all about your vibration. It has nothing at all to do with the other person. It’s your reality. I know this is a hard concept to get our heads around. We are taught the exact opposite from a very early age. But we were taught wrong.

      Huge hugs,


  • So, the belief of competition is of a lower vibration. It doesn’t really exist? It’s just an illusion, so how can one explain the competition for jobs? Is it not really there and it’s all hype, like a lot of other stories, to instill fear? It sounds like a twisted myth.

    So, only those aligned can get the jobs they really want. I guess that makes sense. I am still trying to understand why society makes things so cut-throat and competitive when the truly successful do not compete against others. instead, they tweak their vibration to get better and better. Is this what we should do instead of worrying about the competition out there?

    • Hey Kat,

      Yes, competition is, essentially, a false belief. A pretty pervasive one, mind you, one that’s easy to believe because so many people do, but it’s just a belief. Yes, stop worrying about the competition and focus on what you want and why you want it. And trust that you can have it. There’s only scarcity if you believe there is. And just because most of the world operates under that model, doesn’t mean you have to. 🙂

      Huge hugs!

  • What an awesome post, Melody!!! You still became a teacher of sorts, in your own way and style, and you found your path without the input of anyone else anyway. Hooray! I do hope that you address finding your path in terms of LOA in a future post. It will help a lot of lost souls. You state: “No matter what happens, we are always still on our path”. Yes, this is clear to my inner being, who never has a problem, but the Kat who faces others needs to explain and justify her every step to them when they just don’t get this and creates much tension and turmoil.

    This was truly an uplifting post. I, too, was on top of it all until I was 21 and lived a dream-like state until I started paying attention to what others of a lower vibration around me said, pretty much like you an Alice and I even got to that very low point you guys hit as well. Now, there is something to be said about hitting rock-bottom. The only way to go after that point is up.

    In LOA, I know that competition is actually an illusion and it does not really exist, so there is no point in giving up our dream for anyone or anything, as this is not how the universe works as you described so well here. Even if we make a “mistake”, it is not really a mistake, but how do we explain it to the “powers that be” here in physical who decide whether to take us on board somehwere or not and who think we made a mistake? Or, is it not their decision? It will just happen when we are aligned with it and, if we vibe well with them, they will appreciate our experiences without believing we made a mistake?

    Thank you, again, awesome Melody!

    • Hey Kat,

      How do you explain it them? You don’t.
      Remember that EVERYTHING in your experience is a mirror of your vibration. So, if someone has a problem with your reaction, it’s only because you still have some doubts about it. When you clean those up, others will not doubt you. Of if they do, they won’t be able to get near you. It’s all about you.

      Thanks so much for your kind words. I’m sure I’ll write more about my journey in the future (perhaps that will go into a book, though…) 🙂

      Huge hugs!

  • Huge hugs. (Oh the enthusiasm. Me no happy today.) Yaay! (but still trying) 10 points for trying! lol 🙂

    MATHS! One of my nemesis. I can’t even do basic addition and subtraction. Yet I came first in most of my classes besides MATHS. A source of embarassment and avoided at all times.
    At least I’m lucky. I could be someone that couldn’t read which would be more noticeable in this language based society.

  • Hi Melody,

    You have come so far and give so much hope with this story. If a suicidal person can become as happy and successful as you- there’s no limits to achievement. I appreciate you being so honest in public and what you do here.


    I stumbled upon this Dr. Phil episode today. I don’t generally watch it but it was extremely important to LOA. It aired in America in May and Australia in July. Sadly I do not have the full episode.
    It’s exactly all about this conversation and LOA principles. This young man is LOA!

    They mention the word “delusional” and “unrealistic” many times. They say he needs to go to college and get a “real” job.
    He works part-time in an accessory store while trying to make a music career. He calls himself King Keith and is attractive, charismatic and radiates positivity. However the tittle of the show is “spoilt rotten, needs reality check”

    This type of thing makes me very angry so I had to turn it off. It’s like this guy is so close and they feed him doubts and the audiences in these type of things sit there gleefully waiting for the “delusional” person to break down, cry and go work at McDonalds.
    He believes he is already famous and has so much confidence. He also got a vanity plate ready for when he has a car. The audience laughed at him. I think he was doing a great job.

    • Hey Alice,

      You’re so very welcome. I’ve made peace with everything that’s happened to me in my life and I know that I am who and where I am today because of all of it, not in spite of it. So, I have no problem being open and honest about it all.

      Since I didn’t see the whole show, I can’t really comment on the bits I didn’t see. Regarding the clip you linked to, I don’t really agree with the style of Dr. Phil’s coaching (I think he’s a bit judgmental and harsh, but that’s just me), but he does make a good point. I would make it differently.

      If this young man’s mother is getting resentful of him staying at home and living off of her, then she should no longer do that. That would be her choice and there would be nothing wrong with that. The only thing that I saw as a bit of resistant in this young man was that maybe he had an expectation that his good would come through his mom. I don’t know if he did. The 2 minutes I saw wasn’t enough and Dr. Phil dominated the conversation.

      He has no obligation to get a job and contribute to society in the way his mother and family and Dr. Phil seem to want him to. It seems that everyone has these expectations of him and is now angry that he’s not fulfilling them. They don’t have to support him financially, but there’s no moral high ground here. He’s not doing anything wrong. It’s the mother’s prerogative to not want to support his dream. That has more to do with her fears than his. But to try to shame him into thinking that there’s something wrong with him because it didn’t occur to him to go out and get a job and pay rent, when his mother’s actions probably never made that necessary (I’m guessing), is not helpful. If she cuts him off, he’ll find a way to survive.

      But everyone on that stage seemed more interested in getting him to change his actions so that they could feel better, including Dr. Phil. this was much more about control than allowing.

      My two cents.

      Huge hugs!

      • haha! Well in two minutes you got to the same conclusion I did after watching most of the show.
        They did seem to want to feel better. We have this epidemic of “tall poppy syndrome” (I’m not sure if this is a global expression but it means cutting down one that grows higher than the rest of the flowers)
        He had an unconventional dream and they were trying to change it. If this is being shown on popular talk shows and mass media people are going to believe it. I wonder how people can make a difference to chance this mentality?

        I remember going to a career councillor and everything lead to me doing something creative.
        They said I was creative but “there’s no money in that” (yes I know!!! look at magazines, film, acting, photography, drama, modelling, textiles, graphic design…) the list of creative industries is HUGE. I know he was being ridiculous but you know deep down I heard this line so many times that my subconcious believes it.
        So they tried to use my secondary skill set under creativity which is “people skills”

        • Ah yes. School counselors. I was thinking of majoring in Math (I was in Math competitions and everything) and asked my teacher what I could do with that degree besides teaching (pre internet, this was…)

          Instead of saying listing careers in engineering or computer programming (just to name two huge fields), he said “No. All you could do is teach.” Yeah….

          So, I got a theater scholarship, which no one had an issue with, except the admissions counselor who saw my math scores on the ACT and asked my why the hell I wasn’t pursuing that…

          It’s not the system, my dear. It’s the vibration. I had low self esteem and huge self worth issues and so I attracted lots of experiences that proved to me that no one cared. LOADS.

          As you pointed out, there are tons of people making money with creative endeavors. And they were all part of the same system.

          Also, in retrospect, I’m really happy I didn’t study math. I would be a completely different person today, this blog wouldn’t exist, and I don’t think I’d be very happy. So, I guess that math teacher actually did me a bit of a favor.

          No matter what happens, we are always still on our path. that teacher didn’t mess anything up for me. If I’d had a different vibration, I’d have been inspired to study something besides math, but I truly believe that either way, it was not the way to go. 🙂

          Huge hugs!

  • I used to be the best winner and manifestor as a kid.

    I went in beauty contests and won everytime. I knew I would win. I had great self-esteem. I was the most popular kid in primary school. I was fought over in sports teams. I won many awards and ribbons from art to long-jump. I was the teachers pet. I was awesome! I would go in competitions and magazines not understanding it was a competiton. My little kids mind thought I fill in a form, get my mum to post the envelope which would order the things I wanted. I aways won.
    If you knew the kid I was back then you couldn’t belive this is the same person. Even I don’t know what the heck went wrong.

    The only thing I remember is getting older and first being told it was arrogant and conceited to assume I’d win all the time. Adults tried to teach me “morals” and I remember stating one day “I want to win another beauty competition” I had fun in them and just assumed I’d win everytime.
    That was soon knocked out of me and taught not to love myself.

    My teenage years I went totally downhill into the opposite of everyones favourite person, had crippled self-esteem, was convinced I was ugly, hated and ended up trying to kill myself.

    How a person goes from 100 to 0 I don’t know. But we have to stop squashing those bright sparks. They’ll turn into an Alice. 🙁 They are not full of themselves. They’re positive. Don’t corrupt it. They’d struggle to ever get that back.

    • Hey Alice,

      Well, you went through what we all went though – you were taught to face reality. And someone else’s reality at that. And not really just that, but the worst possible reality they could conjure up. And as you faced reality, you got more of that crap. Now, you’re finding your way back. And you can. You shifted down, and now you can shift back up.

      I actually went through exactly the same thing. I was a bright and shiny kid, turned into a horribly depressed self-loathing teenager who tried to kill herself and slowly but surely found my way back to happy shiny puppiness. Only now I know it and I’m here deliberately, so it’ll be much harder to pull me out of that again.

      There’s nothing wrong with expecting to win. Those who haven’t figured how to consistently get what they want will try to change you so that you also don’t get what you want. But how does that help anyone? Now no one is getting what they want… Doesn’t make sense, does it? 🙂

      Huge hugs!

  • ”In your version, your opponent was not lined up with winning, but there’s a version of him in the Universe, that was”

    i dint quite understand the above bit ! suppose me and my opponent both are lined up with ‘wanting to win’ how does it manifest in THIS reality? who comes first in the physical world we are in right now?
    i dont get it :/

    • Hi Shibani,

      That means that there is more than one reality. If you are aligned with winning and so is your opponent, then you will line up with a reality here you in and he will line up with a reality where he wins. Bottom line: If you are lined up with winning, you’ll win. You don’t have to worry about the competition. In YOUR reality, you get to be the star of your own show.

      I hope that helps.

      Huge hugs!

  • Hey Mind-blowing Awesome Melody,

    You know I had made one biggest mistake after I got you on net…. I downloaded your e-book and without reading it I started reading your blogs as & when I got time…

    Today, when I read your e-book, I realized what was that I was missing badly…

    What a GREAT book I must say… You are Mind-blowing Awesome!

    Thank you so much for everything (I will keep on thanking you)…

    HUGE Hugs & Love forever,

    • Thanks Sameer! The book does provide the basics that the whole rest of the site is based on, so I’m sure it connected some dots for you. I’m so glad you liked it.

      Huge hugs!

  • Hey Awesome Melody,

    Wow Article.

    Loved the way you made us winner 🙂 There are so many ways to be winner and not just Competition.

    Huge Hugs,

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