It’s time for another reader question (and y’all know that I love me some Q&A)! Today’s awesome question comes to us from Lindsay of TheDailyAwe:
My question is about non-attachment when we want to manifest something into our lives. I’m trying to conceive (this is month #1 of trying) and I’m having a hard time with the whole non-attachment thing. How can I NOT feel attached to the result when this is something I want so badly? It’s easy for me to feel non-attached to wanting a new car or wardrobe, for example. But this? Not so much.
What do you recommend for people who are trying to manifest a baby/child into their lives? I understand the whole “divine timing” thing and I also understand that it’s important to let things happen as they are supposed to. But man…it’s HARD to do when it’s something you’ve been waiting to do for years and now that the timing is right (at least emotionally & financially & maturity-speaking)…what do you do to let go of the results in this case?
This is such an excellent question, and one that I’m sure several of my readers can relate to. But even if you can’t, as with all my posts, it merely uses one subject to explain the principles of LOA, and you’ll be able to apply those principles to a myriad of other situations. In other words, listen up boys. 😉 Here’s my answer:
Playing it cool
As I explained in a previous post, when you desperately want something, you’re not going to get it. This isn’t because the Universe is being a little bitch. It’s because when you’re desperate and needy, you are actually focusing vehemently on the fact that you DON’T yet have what you want, and this is what you then keep creating – the absence of what you want. You can’t NEED something and line up with its energy. The cure for this situation is to play it cool – take on an attitude of, “You know, whatever man. It comes, it doesn’t come, it’s all good.” In other words, you have to detach, to get into a place where you’re ok if you don’t get what you want, where you feel good no matter what. This lifts the blockage created by focusing on what you DON’T want and allows the energy of what you DO want to flow freely.
But how do you detach from something you want so much? How do you play it cool (and take note, you can’t fake it. The Universe is like Santa Claus. It freaking knows…) when what you want is to create another life, to bring another little human being into this world and pass on all your hard earned knowledge, hopefully doing as little irreparable damage as possible along the way?
Pregnant women don’t have a baby yet, either
The trick is to stop focusing on what you don’t want (absence of baby) by focusing on what you do want (baby), and to do so almost completely. So, when you think of the baby you want, you can’t trigger the fact that you don’t yet have one at the same time. You have to get to the point where you feel as though you would if you were already pregnant. But how?
When you’re pregnant, you don’t yet have the baby, either. You’re not holding it in your arms, dressing it, bathing it, playing with it, feeding it, accidentally letting it roll off the couch, etc. And yet, you KNOW it’s coming. You don’t have it, but all of your thoughts are of it coming and very few are of it not yet being here. There’s no anxiousness about it not being here. You may have some anxiety about what kind of parent you’ll be, and perhaps a couple of thoughts here and there about how you hope that the baby will be alright, but the GRAND MAJORITY of your thoughts are happily expectant ones. That baby is on its way. You know it’s baking and it has to take as long as it takes to finish. It might come right on time, it might be a bit early and it might be a bit late. But you don’t really care as long as it’s healthy.
Think about that: you don’t care how long it takes for that baby to be finished. You just want it to be healthy. When you’re in the process of conceiving (or creating anything else), however, you tend to stress out about how long it’s taking. OMG, it’s been six weeks and you haven’t conceived yet! OMG, it’s been a year and you’re not pregnant! What are you doing wrong?! You’re probably never going to get pregnant. If it hasn’t happened by now, it’ll probably never happen! You don’t see women in the sixth month of pregnancy declaring “I’m never gonna have this baby! If it hasn’t come out by now, I guess it’s not coming out!”
Just as you wouldn’t want that baby to be born before it’s done, no matter how long that takes, you don’t want to become pregnant before all the Universal components have been lined up. Think about it. Instead of a beautiful, intuitive little angel, you might end up with Quasimodo the serial killing elephant boy. (This is a joke. You cannot screw up the perfection of your future child by stressing out about the timeline. I was making a point. But really now, stop stressing out or your kid will be born a Justin Bieber fan.)
Stop trying to control everything
This baby will be born when the energy for IT and YOU will be perfect and that’s not something you can really determine. You may have the money and the maturity, but all the energy for you and for the baby has to be perfect. So, even though you’re ready, have you considered that maybe the baby isn’t? Perhaps that little soul is still arranging all the circumstances that it needs in order to be born into the perfect environment. Perhaps it’s still waiting for one more global vibrational shift, or for his future best friend to be conceived, or for a few more people to wake up and realize who they really are, or for Tom Cruise to convert to sanity and finally let Katie Holmes out of the basement. There are an infinite number of variables that have to come together in order to create the perfect environment for a new little human, and guess what future mama? You can’t control any of them. Except one, of course: and that’s you. You are but ONE of the components that have to come together and all you can really do is to make sure that this one component – YOU – are aligned with the energy. So, how do you do that?
First of all, stop freaking stressing out about not being pregnant, not being pregnant yet, what you could possibly be doing wrong, what your husband could possibly be doing wrong, what your cat could possibly be doing wrong, or why God hates you so much and doesn’t want you to be a mommy. All of that only accomplishes one thing: It stops you from lining up with the energy of your baby. You basically want to be a loving and happy, receptive vessel that your beautiful new baby can come into (and painfully explode out of, but you probably don’t want to think about that right now. Sorry I brought it up, really), and the only way to do that is to STOP doing the crap that’s keeping you from becoming that vessel and START doing something that will get you there.
You’ll want to take on the attitude you will quite naturally have when you’re pregnant. Here’s what you do: Consider yourself pre-pregnant. You are in a state of becoming pregnant. Just as you will spend the GRAND MAJORITY of your time happily expecting the baby once you’re knocked up, you can now spend the GRAND MAJORITY of your time happily expecting being pregnant. You can’t know exactly when it will happen (just as you can’t know exactly when your baby will be born), but you CAN move into the KNOWING that it’s coming to you, and that it will be conceived when the time is perfect, just as it’ll be born when it’s done baking.
Spend as much time as you can:
- Thinking about how big your belly will get (in a “I will be a radiant pregnant woman”, and not in a “I will look like a heifer” kind of way)
- Reading about pregnancy (happy books, not the ones that talk about all the crap that can go wrong!),
- Looking at maternity clothes (maybe even trying some on? You can use a pillow to fill out the tummy area. Some shops will even have a prosthetic belly for you to try out.)
- Meditating (it will stop the scary voices in your head. You know the ones that keep screaming at you that your eggs are drying up and that you’re failing as a woman.)
- Having some conversations with your future baby, letting it know that you’re ready for it, whenever it chooses to come on down. (DO NOT plead with your baby to get in there already. This would be you, trying to control the timing again. Remember, neediness = barren uterus. Playing it cool = bun in the oven.)
If you spend the majority of your time focusing on thoughts that feel really good, then the few worries you might have here and there won’t have any power. If you’ve been really stressed about conceiving, however, then give yourself a bit of time to make this switch. It might be difficult at first. You’ve gained quite a bit of momentum with the worried stream of thought. It will take a bit of time and effort to get some momentum going on a different way of thinking – one that feels good.
Oh, and when you do get pregnant, Melody’s a really nice name. Just saying…
Become an official member of the Happy Shiny Puppy Army by liking my Facebook page. Benefits include: annoying your friends with your happiness, getting lots of personal attention from me (which is freaking priceless!), and free Mojitos. Um, I might be lying about the Mojitos.
Hey Melody! I was just introduced to LOA a couple of months ago from a good friend who struggled for years to get pregnant, and then was shown the LOA light and of course became pregnant not long after. I, myself, have been working on this for 2 years, and have gotten pregnant twice, but both ended very early (6 weeks). I’m thinking the 2nd one ended like the first because I was sort of expecting it to turn out the same, and I was afraid to get excited about it, knowing what could happen again.
I’ve read through several articles on your site and you are awesome! (Of course you knew this already.) However, my confusion lies in the fact that we’re supposed to play it cool & relaxed and just know it’s coming and not obsess about it… but wouldn’t trying on maternity clothes, reading books, etc as you suggested be kind of contradictory to that? I talk to my husband very matter-of-factly as if the baby is most certainly on it’s way, and not just on baby-related topics, but in talking about events, situations later this year. I have been keeping a journal for the past month or so, writing out how thankful I am for my life and all the good things in it, and for my healthy pregnancy and baby (however I am not officially pregnant with my full-term baby as of yet.) We just got the green light to try again after the 2nd loss, and I’m doing all I can to “know” that I will be a mother soon. Completely changing my thinking since I was last pregnant. But how do you play it cool and not think about it and at the same time keep yourself on the “baby” frequency?
Thanks for being you!
I just happened to stumble on this site as well. Having a laid back feeling about getting pregnant is the hardest thing to do. I have been dealing with this for several years now. I know I just have to focus on the outcome, not how it is going to happen. The hardest part is I feel that it is meant to happen, like I know that I am meant to be a mother again. That is what is keeping me focused. Does the LOA take into consideration age? If I am in my 40’s and I can’t hold off too long before my eggs really dry up!!
I just stumbled upon your site. This topic is exactly what I was after. My husband and I have two wonderful boys. For years I have wanted a daughter. My husband doesn’t wanted anymore children for financial reasons, but i know in his heart he would love a daughter too. So after years of telling him how much I want another child he has given in. We have been trying to conceive for a year now. My question has to do with how his emotions will affect our conceiving. Also he also has had some testicle issues that may have left him infertile (he is going to go get checked out soon). So… I want to know can I LOA a baby into being if medically it’s not possible, and if he doesn’t want a baby as bad as I do can I still manifest one???? I need to figure out the keeping it cool part. Please help! First time on your website and I think it’s AMAZING!!!
[…] can LOA manifest pregnancy? The jury is still out. Deliberate Receiving claims you can and even has advice and instructions to follow. But, how is it possible to follow all the advice and focus on being pregnant in lieu of lack of […]
I’ve been hanging out with children lately and not thinking about this topic at all. I’m letting go of being desperate for it (the process leads you there if you let it) and just enjoying children for who they are and what they add to this existence. I feel more free ( ive always felt comfortable) with them and also am letting go of limiting beliefs I was exposed to growing up like “once you have children, your whole life will be over”. Silly, isnt it? I had no idea I was even carrying that around until I looked further into my nervousness about it.
My sister had a baby baby week. So far, no one has commented about it to me (they would say, ok, it’s your turn now), so that is thankfully gone because it used to get me nervous.
That’s awesome Kat! And now that you’ve shifted, the people in your reality had to comply. So, no more remarks about when you’ll be renting out your womb. 😛
At least we are an interesting bunch to work with! Thank you Melody!
It is so true- husbands/partners go through it and feel a lot of what you are going through, whether it be ivf or the actual pregnancy, so the picture is so appropriate.
I am wondering if just forgetting about it for a while and concentrating on other things in your life will help the situation. That is what I concluded to do after following my intuition. Of course, I remain open to possibilities and my heart is connected to a child somewhere out there. But obsessing about it creates a knot your stomach and lowers your vibration, so it is best to chill, even when everyone around you has children and you see pregnant women everywhere, from parks to concerts.
Chilling is the way to go yes, but you have to actually chill, not just pretend. So, if the babies in the part are bothering you, you can’t just pretend that they don’t…
In that case, doing some energy shifting can be of huge help. I’m getting so many questions on this topic that I’m planning on writing an e-book or doing some kind of product for this. I already recorded a coaching call (will be out in the next few weeks) that deals with this very topic. But I have a strong feeling that people are going to want more. 🙂
Yes, Melody, it is like true love- you want it and it would be great to have it, but it comes on its own, without your interference, so you wait. In the meantime, you live your life to the fullest, enjoy it, reach the goals you want and concentrate on what you do have, not on the lack of it.
The same applies to pregnancy. You want a child and it would be great to have it, but it comes on its own time. That is the miracle. There is nothing else you can do but wash your hands of it, at least this is how I see it. It is tough and sad, but you can’t get depressed about it. Epecially after ivf. Going through assisted reproductive methods at least teaches you that you can ovulate and get fertilized and all the details, so it is not like it cannot happen.
Just some ideas you may wish to incorporate in the future.
Thanks so much Kat. I’ve had a couple of clients who have undergone IVF and it can be heart wrenching. We have to remember that if it feels like that, heart braking, frustrating and desperate, it’s not inspired action. This is one of those subjects that drives people toward LOA, because they’re willing to try anything (even feeling good) to have a baby. But when a desire is that big, the potential for alignment is also big, and when you shift some of that energy, the relief is just breathtaking.
I have to say, I hope no one takes this the wrong way, but I kind of love working with women who want to get pregnant. 🙂
Hi Melody, i felt a great relief after reading ur blog abt pregnancy and LOA. I am planning for a month now for baby. I was going through all that u mentioned above. I will make sure i read ur blog everyday. I feel like you are talking to me and giving your valuable inputs. LOA has always worked for me and will surely work this time too. I will make sure i play cool. Thanks a lot for your blog. It made me think differently.
May GOD bless you.. 😀
Thanks so much for your kind and wonderful feedback. I really appreciate it and I’m so happy that this post was helpful to you.
I’m glad you’ll be sticking around and look forward to reading more comments from you. 🙂
Thank you for this post. My husband and I have been trying to conceive for two years now. I was labeled with the diagnosis of PCOS, even though my ovarian reserve is high. I was just wondering about not worrying or thinking about it anymore. It’s not even me doing that but those around me asking and questions and being pregnant.
But, just like I met my spouse, when I was not thinking about it or wondering about it and actually giving up on marrying someone, he appeared just like that. Same concept with this.
To add to what you guys were talking about before, that once you have someone, the others show up, it also holds true that when you give up on it and stop looking, then it just appears! Both are based on not obsessing about it and not having it occupy your mind, allowing you to be calm and not emit vibes of desperation and just enjoying yourself!
Look forward to it happening. When someone asks you if you’re pregnant, just say “not yet. But I will be.” And feel it as though you were already pregnant – you don’t have the baby then either, but you KNOW that you will. Be pre-pregnant. Then change the subject. Walk away if you have to. If someone is going to insist on spewing their fears all over you, just get away from them. This is too much of a trigger for you to sit there and listen to them and hold on to your good feelings. Let your reality fill in with those who will believe in your future pregnancy the same as you do.
A lot of this comes down to distraction. Don’t try to NOT think of getting pregnant. Think of something else instead – something so compelling that it will hold your attention. The more distracted you are from it, the faster you’ll allow it. 🙂
Huge hugs !
Hahaha. I’ve been spending most of my adult life trying NOT to have babies, yet here is someone who wants them more than anything. The world is such a strange and interesting place.
So what you’re saying, Melody, is that if I REALLY focus on the fact that I don’t have a kid, I won’t have to use condoms anymore?
You are truly a blessing from above. An ANGEL. By the way, what’s your address if I end up having to mail you any child support bills?
Erm, no, Fred. Keep wearing the Loveglove, my dear. Considering that the urge to procreate is an ancient, survival based one, I’m not at all certain that you possess the necessary focusing power to overcome that, particularly if your only motivation is to go “commando” while you bless as many members of the female population with your bedroom presence as possible (notice, how I strategically avoided the word “manwhore”). Of course, I could be wrong, perhaps your desire to freestyle it could be sufficient, but I’m not willing to bet child support payments on it, just as I’m not personally willing to forgo birth control. Better safe than suddenly becoming a mommy.*shudder*
Hugs (safe, latex covered ones)
I was a bit afraid to read this post, because even after a hysterectomy – I do not wish to be pregnant again – it was awesome experience but 2 times was enough.
I got pregnant on my wedding night….some little guy just made it past the barrier and jelly and swam happily to perfect timing! And we lost that possibility about 4 months into the pregnancy. Then 2 years later, right on plan we got pregnant again. We were getting old and thinking maybe we would just adopt so we put lots of effort into that idea.
I never got a positive pregnancy test with #2…for the whole 9 and 1/2 months I was pregnant…wow she was reluctant to arrive here…
My partner did pregnancy #3 and we adopted…..I can say this none of the timing was perfect for us….none….and by adopting we were able to help our other two children be free from being mini- us……we were so freed up to let them develop into their own selves and not own or control this new being ( well safety and health were kept in mind)
So many of my friend who could not conceive also needed to work on letting go of who the baby would be…..and free up their notion – they are their own person… and we only get to be the best guides we can be…..take some time to learn how to see and understand a new person and look at what one really wants to imprint on that new person in the first 6 or 7 years of life….that will help to line up energy…and remove some of the pressure.
Also a wise woman physician said to me, that women and men need to eat extremely healthily these days for a year before pregnancy…and get off the pill….there is so much estrogen and other toxins in our foods right now that we need to learn about all that stuff too…babies have so many allergies these days….and problems to overcome….work on those things too
Another neat post….
You’ve added such an important aspect to this post, that I didn’t even touch on: Why does a woman want to be pregnant? If it’s to add something she thinks is missing, or to make up for mistakes (or anything negative like that), it could well keep her from conceiving. But if she feels pure joy at the idea of bringing a little baby into the world, her energy is lined up.
Oh, and it’s quite common for couples who have given up and decided to adopt to get pregnant. The giving up part lets go of the resistance. 🙂
Thank you so much for this insight!
Pretty awesome post, Melody. It reminds me of rituals and vows people make (on a religious basis) in order to be blessed with a child. These are normally carried out by couples who have not conceived after many attempts. Long before I knew about the LOA I used to wonder how some of these rituals actually worked. Now, in theory, I think I have it figured out.
People who normally attempt to have children as a way of ‘proving themselves’ to eager (annoyingly naggy) elders / themselves / any other reason NEED to have this baby as a form of validation. Or maybe they’re not trying to prove anything, they just NEED a baby. As you said, needing doesn’t work. As a last resort, they turn to God and rituals…lo and behold, it works! Now, while I do believe in the Almighty, I think what really happens is that they let go of the neediness and leave the fate of their pregnancy to God / a higher power and wait. Their trust and faith allows them to surrender the need to control everything and they believe that everything will be fine now that the ritual is done, which in turn summons to them the proverbial stork (after some more bed-rocking), and the couple now has a beautiful baby coming in 9months. What do you think? Yet another example of Need = No No, Whatever = Yes Yes.
Also, Melody’s a great name and all, but if I could name a kid I’d name him ‘You’re Awesome’. Everywhere he goes that’s what people would call him. That kid wouldn’t need self-development (ever!), he’d be so pumped with self-esteem from the second he’s born he’d be able to conquer the world by the time he’s 12. 🙂
You’re so right. When the couple gives up the NEED for the baby and just trusts that everything will be ok, they let go of their resistance and are often successful. They may not know exactly why it worked (or they attribute it to faith), but who cares?
I love the name (considering you are the Lord of the, um, – OMG I can’t remember the whole damn thing. Can you not give yourself a nickname? – it’s quite fitting.) The did could never get in fights, really. I mean, what bully could beat up on a kid after yelling “Hey! You’re Awesome!” He’d look deranged… Actually, it would be a great name for a dog, too. OMG, I’m so stealing this for when I get a dog! Ha!
Haha! No bullying, no insults, and naysayers would have no effect on this kid. Can you imagine a douchebag teacher attempting to break him? “You’ll never amount to anything, You’re Awesome! You’re such a waste of space…You’re Awesome! I hate you…You’re Awesome! Gaarrrhhf**kdangitfridgetpfft!!”
And that would be an awesome name for a dog (pun definitely intended)! Steal away, Melody! 😀
Another great post, Melody!
Reminds me of the Abraham analogy of feeling pregnant in anticipation of something you want happening (like a new job or a cool $10,000): you haven’t got it yet but you know it’s coming and its enough to get excited about it.
You’re absolutely right. I love that analogy and I’m sure it bled through in this explanation. I try not to blatantly steal from them, but the fact is, I listen to a lot of Abe and that’s bound to shine through here and there. 🙂
Hugs to you,
Read it. Then re-read it. Then read it again to let it really sink in. You’re hilarious. And you really helped me out with this one.
See, because of my surrogacy experience, I was all stuck in feeling sorry for myself, “Why was it SO EASY FOR ME to get pregnant for other people but not myself?!” Believe you me, I threw that pity party several times over. And I haven’t even been trying for a long time. At all!
Thank you, Melody. Sending you a big squeeze!
Thanks Lindsay. I’m glad you liked it. 🙂
And thanks for letting me publish the question. I’m not sure if there’s a subject that women stress out about more than conceiving…
It’s easier to get pregnant for someone else, because it triggers far less of your own resistance. You don’t have to be the parent, you don’t have to worry about messing the kid up, you don’t have to pay the bills, etc. (insert your own personal neuroses here.) You have the advantage of knowing what that felt like, this freedom from all your own crap. Just find that feeling again. 🙂
You know what though? Don’t knock the “trying to get pregnant” phase. I mean, from what I hear, once you have the little critter, all those lovely trying-activities (that would be sex, in case I wasn’t clear) just go out the window. So there’s a case to be made for prolonging that phase a bit and enjoying it for as long as you can. Just saying… (was that your husband hollering “thank you!”?)
The picture had me in stitches – then I read the post! LOL!
On a serious note, though, it all makes perfect sense. Be happy in the now and the future will manifest just like you want it to.
That’s exactly it: Make peace with where you are right now, and you are setting yourself up for more great stuff. It’s all about how you feel right now.
Cool Melody. I was lucky enough to have two ‘accidents’ thirty years ago – guess the stars were all lined up!
I’ve been trying to figure out how to apply this to menopause. There are so many images out there of happy pregnancy and happy baby mommy, it’s not too big a stretch to put yourself there. But honestly, I had no idea how incredible it would feel to finally have no more estrogen in my body. For me, menopause was eight years of how-much-longer-could-this-possibly-last???
Now that I’m on the safe side of 60, I look back and shake my head, but I still have no idea how a person can manifest this lovely state when you just don’t know what it’s going to feel like. If there’s a way to help women in their late forties and fifties feel like they’re already in their sixties… wow! There are major fortunes to be made here!
Your thoughts? Or maybe this is another post one day?
Oooh, wow, Mary Carol,
I think you’d better be the one to write about menopause. I’m nowhere near it, and some of these topics do require at least some personal experience. I can tell you that my mom went through it and it was easy for her. She just stopped having her monthly visitor one day, end of story. No hot flashes, no side effects, nada. I’m hoping it’ll be like that for me. I think we’ve built up such an expectation of suffering around the subject that a lot of women can’t imagine that it won’t be hard. Also, I think it has something to do with the antiquated idea that if a woman can’t bear children anymore, she’s somehow worth less. Even the most modern woman can unknowingly harbor a belief like that.
But I’m not sure if it’s about feeling sixty – age is just an arbitrary number. I think it’s about feeling your own power, feeling the confidence that many women don’t allow themselves to feel until they’re older. I think there comes a point where you think “at this age, I can let go of all those insecurities”.
Just like childbirth drastically shifts a woman’s energy, I think menopause is also a process that allows a woman to release a tremendous amount of negative beliefs, if she allows it. The process can be gentle (and possibly even uneventful if you carry little resistance around the subjects involved) or it can be a rough ride. We each learn in our own way and follow our own path.
Ok, so I guess I did have a little bit to say about the subject. 😉
Oh, boy – I could tell you harrowing tales specific to this topic, but bottom line, we just want to know that eventually, somehow, it will happen, right? If you’ve been pregnant and delivered before, then unless you know of a specific medical problem, odds are you will eventually conceive. I think it’s a great idea to let it go and just say,”When the time is right for all involved, my baby will arrive.”
Conception issues, doctor visits, testing, your physical body, genetics, and lovely, lovely hormones are a big mish mash strewn with landmines, if you think of it that way. If you just think,”Everything happens as it should,” and refuse to fret the Who What When Where Why How niggling details, at the very least you’ll be CALMER. Which always helps.
If it wasn’t easy for us to conceive, the human race would’ve died out long ago. The truth is, our modern, cerebral world has caused us to overthink almost everything, wreaking havoc on what should be a very natural, simple and enjoyable (you know, if you’re doing it right) process. Our bodies know how to do this. It’s our heads that get in the way.
Sensational breakdown Melody! Luv playing it cool. The best way to create someone you want, is not to really want it. Because of course, wanting it too much sends a signal to the universe of “it’s not here”, and we all know the lil literal b the uni can be 😉 (Clever 🙂
Thanks for sharing!
Thanks so much for your wonderful comment. It seems so counterintuitive doesn’t it? But who hasn’t been had the experience of suddenly getting flirted with left and right AS SOON AS we get into a relationship? we wonder, “where were all these men/women before?” They were always there, but we didn’t let them in. As soon as we stop being desperate for them, as soon as we feel like we already have a partner, a bunch of potential partners show up…
Huge hugs to you!
Fred Tracy (Master of the Art of ‘Bang Many, Bang One, Bang Bang’) is probably reading your reply to Ryan’s comment with a big grin on his face going “Not to me it doesn’t”.
*Free-plug high-five, up high!* :p
Ahahahahaha. So you’ve named Fred Tracy then, have you? This is too funny. But perhaps you’re right. Maybe if you’re into multiple partners, you don’t get the flood of eligible people moving in until you’ve reached your limit. Say, if you’ve got three girlfriends and a mistress, THEN you meet a bunch of hot girls. Although, at that point, I’d think you’d be too exhausted to notice… ;D
Hahahaha that is hilarious Derrek.
Yeah, maybe Melody is right, and because of technically always “looking” for a partner, I’ll never actually reach that upper limit threshold where they started. Like magic.
Or maybe, because I’m into so much, uhm, abundance, they’re always just appearing left and right to begin with?
Oh man, what a conundrum!
I like that my title has four Bangs. Lol.