Today’s post is inspired by another reader question. Anonymous asks: “If someone has an accident, did they make it happen? How can they deal with it and heal from it, without continuing to vibrate it and attracting more?”
Here’s my answer:
First of all, I don’t really like to use phrases like “someone made something happen”. That’s kind of along the lines of saying “it’s your own damn fault”. Those kinds of thoughts never feel good, and since we know that negative emotion signals that whatever we’re thinking isn’t serving us, these kinds of blaming thoughts just aren’t true.
However… everything we experience is a result of our vibration. Everything. And that includes the “accidents”. So what’s the difference between what I just said and claiming that we made it happen? A lot. When you make something happen, it implies that you did something wrong and that you got what you deserved. Even if you didn’t know what you were doing, you still ended up causing your own misery. This is the kind of thinking that leads people to believe that bad things happen in order to teach us a lesson. And, as I’ve already explained in a previous post, that’s just bullshit.
When we look at this from another angle – the one that states that what happens to you is a result of your vibration, we take the blame out of it. We eliminate the idea of punishment and judgment, neither of which feel good. Your experiences are vibrational feedback, plain and simple.
Your vibrational feedback system
Let’s say that you’ve got one of those cars with censors, which let you know when you get too close to other cars or objects. It beeps when you back up and indicates your position by getting louder and faster the closer you get to the car behind you. So, the closer you get to having an experience that doesn’t serve you – crashing into the car behind you – the stronger this indicator gets by beeping faster and louder. This feedback mechanism does not judge you, it does not start screaming at you to STOP ALREADY, YOU FREAKIN’ IDIOT, it does not turn into your mother in law. And if you ignore the feedback and bump into the car behind you, it doesn’t blame you or tell you “I told you so”, nor does it now claim that you deserve whatever repair bill or ticket you’ve got coming to you. YOU may do all of those things, but the computer running these censors and feedback system doesn’t say a word. It’s only function is to provide you with information. What you do with that information is entirely up to you.
Your vibrational feedback system is the same. Your first indication that you’re getting closer to something you don’t want is negative emotion. Ignore that, and your indicator beeps a little louder and faster. Maybe you have a negative experience – someone is rude to you, or you cut your finger. Keep on ignoring the signal and it will keep getting louder – your experiences become harder and harder to ignore until finally something happens that gets your attention. How “bad” that something is depends entirely on your own personal tolerance for suffering and how conditioned you are to the belief that suffering is necessary.
The Real World
But let’s bring this from the theoretical into the “real” world: You’ve got a vibration going on inside you that isn’t serving you. Somewhere along the line, you’ve adopted the belief that the world will stop spinning on its axis and people will just generally disintegrate into incompetent blobs if you don’t make sure everything runs smoothly. You’ve made yourself responsible for everything and everyone in your reality. Now, this thought doesn’t feel good to you (first sign that it’s not serving you), but you’ve also come to believe that sometimes in life, you’ve just got to bite the bullet. You just have to force yourself to suffer for the “greater good”. And so, you keep pushing along, running yourself ragged, picking up everyone’s slack at work, at home and even with strangers. YOU have pretty much stopped mattering completely. You don’t have time to take care of yourself, damn it. You have way too much to do.
Your vibration is shouting “I have so much to do! I have way too much to do!” and “Nothing gets done without me! People are helpless without me!” What do you think you’re going to manifest? More and more incompetent people in your reality who seemingly can’t feed themselves, spell check a report or take a crap without your help, as well as more and more work. The Universe will keep piling it on, it has no choice. It has to bring you more of what matches your current vibration. So, you’ll become ever more overwhelmed, ever busier, and more and more convinced that the world truly needs you to be its safety net. It’s an ugly downward spiral.
And all the while, your feedback system, the one designed to let you know when you’re moving in a direction that’s taking you away from what you truly want, is beeping away. You feel stressed, frustrated, maybe even a bit depressed, but that doesn’t really matter. They make a pill for that now. You just keep shoving those emotions away and getting on with business. After all, if you don’t do it all, who the hell will?? You’ve had some negative emotion, but you ignored it. You just keep on activating that belief that isn’t serving you. If your feedback system is going get your attention, it’s going to have to step it up a notch.
So, maybe you get the flu. That should slow you down, give you a chance to think, make you take a nap and allow your vibration to rise a bit (bringing clarity and perspective with it). But no! You don’t have time to be sick or to rest. You take another pill, force yourself to muddle through, even though you’re miserable. Why does God hate you so? Why would he give you the flu when you’ve already got so much on your plate? Why is life so unfair? Well, it’s not God, honey. It’s your feedback system saying “Um, you’re about to crash, yo. Y’all might want to pay attention to that.” But you don’t have time for this crap. You hit the gas and keep on plugging along. No flu or deathly pallor is going to keep you from doing your “job”. You’re made of stronger stuff than that!
Your feedback system keeps on getting louder and faster. Again, it’s not judging you, it’s just giving you information. You’re the one who decided (through life experience and determining what you like and don’t like) what goals you ultimately consider to be desirable and which ones you want to stay away from. Your feedback system is letting you know that you are moving in a direction that YOU determined, at some point, to be something you don’t want. It’s telling you “Look, you said that you wanted a life of ease, of passion, of happiness and joy, but what you’re moving towards, what you’re focusing on, is taking you away from that. Just thought you’d want to know.”
Your feedback system will never stop escalating its message, as long as you keep focusing on something that’s taking you away from what you want. It will never leave you, it will never let you down and it will never break. You’ll always have a chance to hear it, and you always will. Eventually.
So, if you keep on ignoring the signals you’re getting, you may find yourself driving down the road one day, overwhelmed, distracted, near to a nervous breakdown, and you get into an accident. You end up in the hospital with a broken leg. You can’t believe it. What will everyone do without you? How will they survive? Why hasn’t WWIII broken out yet? Surely the governments of the world will crumble without you holding the strings of reality together… No? What’s that? People are figuring it out? Your husband did NOT forget to feed the kids or drop them down the garbage disposal? Your boss managed to get through some meetings without you? Perhaps a few things were rocky during the adjustment period. You’ve trained people pretty well to be completely dependent on you, but they’re finding their way during your forced absence. It slowly starts to dawn on you that you were the one who decided to take on all this responsibility. You were the one that assumed that no one could get along without you. You were the one who was running yourself ragged. And you begin to realize that you were wrong. No one was holding a gun to your head, even though it sometimes felt like it.
Your feedback system created a situation “loud” enough to get your attention. Now, this doesn’t have to be an accident. Manifestations are extremely personal and always perfectly tailored to the individual. A great many people will ignore their feedback system until it creates so much suffering that they finally just give up. They cry “I can’t take it anymore. I don’t care what happens, but I can’t do this anymore.” And then they let go of all those false beliefs and they gain a different perspective, one that feels a hell of a lot better. Accidents, illnesses and traumatizing experiences are all essentially the same thing – massive indicators of vibrational discord.
Can you create an accident?
Most people who have accidents do so for the reason I just explained. But, it’s also possible to focus so vehemently on accidents, by being afraid of having one, that you could, in fact, manifest having one. This takes much more than a fleeting thought here and there, though. You’d have to have a pretty strong fear and activate it often to bring this kind of event about. Usually, our negative manifestations can’t be taken quite that literally (cancer is rarely created by a fear of cancer.) You have to dig a little deeper.
What does it all mean?
So, what if you’ve had an accident? What should you do then? Well, first, don’t beat up on yourself. Don’t obsess over what feedback you may have missed. Allow it to play out. If you’ve been hurt and that will force you to rest, TAKE THE REST. This is the most valuable thing you can do. Take a step back and give yourself some time. Accidents are generally a great way to stop people in their tracks, giving them time and opportunity to evaluate their current vibration and perspective. Sometimes even just a near accident can have the desired effect. It gets you to STOP and THINK, something you may not have taken the time to do for a very long time. Take that opportunity.
Can you prevent accidents?
Yes and no. Worrying about having an accident isn’t going to serve you (notice that it doesn’t feel good?). But if you get good at paying attention to your vibrational feedback system, and shifting your vibration and perspective when you’re in the negative emotion stage, then you’ll have much fewer physical manifestations of those limiting beliefs. Will they ever go away completely? No. And you don’t want them to. Physical manifestations of limiting beliefs will definitely get less severe (more rude people, less accidents) as you notice them faster, but watching as other people mirror your beliefs back to you, playing this game with those around you, is part of the fun of life. And your response to these events may change drastically. For example, you may meet someone who turns out to be an absolute dick to you. But after some contemplation, instead of just deciding this must be a horrible person, you realize that they were showing you something very valuable about yourself in a detailed and utterly perfect way – one which you could not miss. You uncover a specific belief and shift it, leaving you happier, lighter and freer than you were before. You end up being grateful to this person who acted like a dick, for being willing to play the game with you and for showing you something you needed to see. Over time, “negative” events become powerful and sometimes even fun opportunities for growth.
Now it’s your turn: Have you had an accident? Looking back, can you see how it may actually have served you? Did it stop you in your tracks and help you make a valuable change?
I’m hoping you can help me out because I’m having trouble understanding why I hit a deer tonight and messed up my car. I feel like I’ve been vibrating on a pretty positive level lately. I’m still working on how I react to certain situations/judgments so I’m guessing that this accident served as a way to test my newfound reaction skills but I’m confused why something like this would happen when I feel more happy than I have in years.
I know you say we can’t manifest in others realities but my mom has been drilling us with how worried she is for me to get into a car accident. Could this have anything to do with me hitting the deer tonight?
I can’t explain how much this post resonates with me. Very cool. 🙂
I gotta’ ask though…how do you tell the difference between a limiting belief and a negative emotion? They’re not the same, are they? Let me tie this with your Thanksgiving post. Lets say someone doesn’t want to be at the family get-together. Everytime he even thinks about it, he gets nauseous and his stress levels spike. That’s a limiting belief, yes? It feels bad, it’s a negative emotion, but it’s not something that’ll take him away from his life goals. I’m guessing the solution is to shift his vibration (which he can do by reading Deliberate Receiving…a blog you might have heard of?) and then he’ll be able to see the joy in family gatherings.
Lets say scenario 2 consists of a guy who wants to go skydiving. It’s his dream but he feels bad about it even though he’s never been afraid of heights or flying. This is probably the internal buzzer going “Hey buddy, remember that goal you had of living till you were 100? Yeah…..see the thing is, and I hate to break it to you, but that’s not going to happen if you go through with this. ……..No, not like a broken leg. More like…just broken. Insanely broken.”
So how do we tell? And if we’re getting negative feedback about something, even if it’s feedback about a person / relative / spouse, can we turn that feeling around by shifting our perspective or is just moving out of their radar a better option?
I think there’s a false premise at work here, and that’s that there are a bunch of “dangerous” vibes and experiences out there and it’s your job to avoid them. And so your feedback system is yelling”No! Not the family get together! No! Don’t cross the street!” That’s not really accurate. You are deciding (vibrationally) in each moment what you line up with. It’s no one else’s decision. So, if you get nauseous every time you think of your family gathering, that’s your inner being telling you that the way you’re looking at your family is not accurate and isn’t serving you. It doesn’t have to be “danger”. It could simply be that you’re judging them, or that you feel diminished by them.
Regarding really dangerous things – you’re not going to line up with death or total FUBARness by making one wrong choice. If that skydiving trip is going to lead to death (like the plane will crash) and you’re not a match to that, you will not be on that plane. Either you’ll have a very strong feeling to not get on it (one you cannot ignore), or, more likely, you’ll get in a minor accident on the way there which will make you late. The Universe won’t leave that shit to chance.
I actually did a post about how to tell the difference just recently. I’ll link to it below this post. (Missed one, didya? I forgive you… He, he.)
Hugs and a zigzag snap,
Love this post Melody…and for me, the sensor beeping that we ignore transcends just accidents…I think it is about listening to our warning systems in all aspects of life…our relationships, our careers, our personal lives…all factions of our lives have sensors that are exquisitely sensitive and will, if we listen to them, guide us in a healthy direction. The problem, as I see it, is that we so OFTEN ignore the beeps….for a multitude of “justifiable” reasons. This post was lovely in it’s reminder to listen for the warning beeps…be more mindful of their presence and not only can it help eliminate accidents…it can minimize the emotional pain in your life as well.
You’re so right. As will all LOA principles, you can truly apply them to any area in your life. Your feedback system is always working. The problem is that most of us have become so accustomed to feeling negative emotions, we’re simply not aware of them anymore. The great news is that you can re-sensitize yourself. I can attest to that. I have very little tolerance for negative emotion now. Frustration feels as awful to me as depression used to. And I notice those reactions, emotional and physical, much faster now. Well, most of the time. Sometimes, issues have to come right up and smack me in the face before I realize what’s going on. But even that’s good. At least then I know what I’m dealing with. 🙂
Huge hugs to you,
This is great! Such a comprehensive explanation of how accidents are created and avoided by paying attention to the emotional guidance system.
I have one question. What if the accident happens to someone near and dear to us? Do you have any responsibility per se. I mean, you know them, they are a part of your world, your experience. What does the Law of Attraction have to say about that?
Take it one step further – what if you should have/could have been there and if you had the accident would not have happened?
Great question. No, you don’t have responsibility for what happens to them. You can’t create in another’s experience. If they are going to manifest an accident, they’re going to do it if you’re there or not. And the Universe will not allow you to mess it up, either way (so if you’re a match to helping them, circumstances will be orchestrated that will allow for that to happen, and you can’t miss out on it.)
What you DO want to pay attention to is how your loved one’s accident has affected you. THIS is the part that matches you. Why would you call something into your experience that feels like that? If you’re worried sick, then the way you’re looking at this accident is not serving you, and here’s your opportunity to figure it out and release it. If you were not a match, then the accident still would’ve happened, but you wouldn’t be aware of it until it was over and everything was fine. Or you would be aware, but you’d feel very differently. And yes, it’s possible to see a loved one suffer and still know that they are ultimately ok. It’s possible to not worry yourself to death (which helps no one, least of all your loved one, and certainly not yourself.)
You don’t make other people have accidents, but you’ll match up with that experience if it mirrors something inside you.
Some years ago I had difficulties with accepting these idea’s, I mean accidents are no real accidents, but they have a meaning? But Now I believe it is true.
I like your idea that accidents are vibrational systems, illness included. Some months ago I had 3 minor car accidents in less than one month and I actually was able to track down how it served me. It was a signal: I had to slow down and be more aware of what is happening around me, inclusive how people where treating me. From that moment on, I paid more attention to what happened with my car – my big BEEP BEEP BEEPER 🙂 served me well as vibrational feedback system was again happy: after all was repaired, I was more aware and more attentive and aware and I felt great again. (and the accidents stopped)
Thanks for sharing
Wow Marc! Three accidents in one month! That had to get your attention and what a great opportunity to see a pattern! I’m so glad you were able to see the value in your experiences. And thanks so much for sharing them with us here!
Wait, the real world exists?
Well, while I agree to an extent about our emotions being our feedback system.. I do think that they are helping us experience contrast. Wait, I think I just said what you meant to say there.
About accidents: I have survived every life – threatening accident I’ve been in, so I’m pretty secure and safe. My guidance sustem is saying ‘Relax’n’take it easy, chap.’
The real world exists (ok, well, sort of. But we’ve all agreed on this hallucination, so…). What aspect of it you see is up to you.
And yeah… I’m afraid you’ve just agreed with me. Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone. 😉
I’ve had a few accidents myself. I totaled three cars before I was 25. Walked away from all of them without a scratch. Unfortunately, not even those accidents could get my attention back then and I kept right on going. I had a VERY high tolerance for suffering. Not anymore (now the sniffles get my attention, LOL).
I like what your guidance system is saying. I second that. 🙂
Thanks for another strong post, Melody.
For me, it’s illness. Twice in my life I’ve been under way too much stress, and ended up with life-changing illnesses. Thank goodness! It’s amazing how clear the message is once you get it, and how utterly blind you were before.
Related question: What if you’re thinking about an issue and you get sick? I’ve appreciated your suggestions on the ladder of change, and also on shifting in a general way before moving toward the specific. But it still sneaks up on me. One minute I’m fine, thinking I’m working something through, and the next minute, wham, nausea and vertigo, clear signs to back off. It makes it hard to return to working on the same issue. Is there another message here, something I’m missing?
The detachment of thinking of myself as a science experiment is probably the most helpful idea I’ve had in years. The whole being alive thing is just so interesting…
Hi Carol, I´d like to say some words about your describe as your experience (..one minute fine, next..).
I can´t see what occurs in our physical condition as direct a consequence of what we entertain in your mind currently, as you describe it. Our physical conditions don´t reflect our conscious thinking directly and under all circumtstances. So in this I don´t think that the way we feel is a signal of we going in the wrong direction (get off our source´s vibration). Our bodies perform their own adjustment processes, in their own time, according their functionality – even when we are very close to what is going on vibrationally, we have to consider our bodies as own entities, which also harbour our memories, our long forgotten histories; everything is stored and saved there. So you never know what is about to come up, onto the surface to get healed at a time. To trust your body, that it comes up at the right time to get integrated by you conscioulsy experiencing it (again), is wise to do then (our body knows more, than we do).
I understood about this through an Alaskan story by Jack London. They had to travel a long devasting route through the ice desert by dog sleighs at those days to get from one camp to the other. They had to keep the delicate balance between equipment and supplies and their pace of travel as a question of life or death. On one occasion, due to paying customers they took with them, they skipped this balance; they fed the dogs due to their exhaustion, but didn´t give them sufficient time for rest (because they had been late due to their overload of baggage), and the dogs, fed as they were, couldn´t survive this exertion, because of the lack of their resting time (wich had to be about 2 weeks to get their organisms back to recovery).
Honoring our bodies signals has to be priority; right thinking cannot override this, not in my experience.
Hi Mary Carol,
I’m going to disagree a bit with Sara and also agree with some other points.
From my point of view, our bodies are not separate, but are also direct mirrors of what’s going on in our vibration. However, they don’t always mirror back everything to us in real time. Often, what’s going on in our bodies (illness) is a manifestation, and one that’s gathered some energy. In that case, you can’t just snap your fingers and make it go away. You have to “fix” your vibration and then wait for your body to catch up. It won’t generally be able to do so instantly. I totally agree that our bodies know what to do. Each of our cells has a little inner vibration, and one that will always tend towards our highest vibration as long as we don’t do anything to mess it up. But when we do, when he focus on things that don’t serve us and then hate our bodies on top of that, we push that vibration down. If we back off, our bodies know exactly what to do.
I often experience a major energy slump after releasing something big, or even while I’m going through the releasing of it. If I honor that and allow my body to rest and recover, I get better much faster. My body is telling me it needs to rest and heal. I try to listen to that. It doesn’t mean that something’s wrong. It’s all part of the process.
Having said all of that, I also have a sensitive stomach, and if I focus on something that REALLY doesn’t serve me, I tend to get nauseous, and fast. I know that this is a signal from my body to back off. It may be the same for you, Mary Carol. Only you can really know by paying attention to your body. If this is the case, then back off when you have this reaction. Meditate, get into a high, stable vibration, and THEN go back to that issue. If you get nauseous again, back off again. Eventually, you’ll be able to find a better feeling perspective, but only from a higher stand point. Some issues take longer to figure out than others. Be patient, and when in doubt, take a nap or do something unrelated and fun. Know that everything you do while in a high vibration will benefit you and will help you release any of those pesky, lower frequencies. 🙂
Thanks Sara and Melody! What you both say makes a lot of sense.
This post combined with the one about creativity have been a huge trigger for me. I’ve basically been semi-nauseous for two days. And taking care of myself with lots of naps, thank you Melody! This afternoon, it feels like clarity has seeped back in.
I was questioning whether the discomfort was a sign that I was on the wrong track with my thinking (wanting stuff), or if it meant I’d hit something big that needed to be resolved (lack of entitlement?). Turns out, I WAS way off track, and I needed to bounce off a boulder to get me back on my path. Since joining the blog, my sense of wanting stuff has been heightened, and it hit a peak with the creativity post. It took a physical sucker-punch for me to realize that I was going away from what I know in my heart/gut/soul to be true. Stuff doesn’t matter.
Apologies to the blog for taking such a contrarian view, but it’s what feels absolutely true for me. The only thing that’s really, permanently accessible is energy. So for me, wanting stuff is a sneaky trap. Looks like a shiny happy puppy, but it’s a fake. The real happy puppy is inside me all the time, shining away through the layers of crap, panting to be uncovered.
All this is within the limits of security, like enough food and comfortable shelter. So that’s where my stuff-acquiring energy needs to go, toward security so I can relax and play as the shiny happy puppy all the time. And my gratitude goes to the universe that I’m basically already there. Woohoo! Pensions rock!
Huge hugs to you, Sara and Melody and everybody reading this. Melody, thanks for the combined posts that have bounced me back straight. Even though I know it’s not everybody’s path or the one you talk about most here on the blog, it’s mine and it feels so good!
Hi Mary Carol,
I don’t think you’re taking a contrarian view, at all. I agree completely -stuff doesn’t matter. I just don’t think that this is the same as banishing all stuff. Stuff can be nice and fun. But when we make it our main goal, when we make it important, we tend to lose sight of our real priorities. Stuff is the garnish on the main meal. Nice, and often very pretty, and sometimes even tasty, but on it’s own, not worth the trip to the restaurant. 🙂
Thanks for the validation, Melody! I love the restaurant analogy. It’s true that I’m pretty picky about which restaurants I visit these days.
Sometimes I bounce around on whether I’m feeling great because I’m sticking with a comfortable old belief even though it’s actually wrong, or I’m feeling great because I’ve reaffirmed an old belief that’s totally right. This feels so good that it’s hard to believe it could actually be wrong, so I’ll choose to stick with the stuff-doesn’t-matter shiny, happy vibe.
Maybe one day you can address this question of how far and in which direction to go in trusting discomfort. When is it a signal to back up and try again softer, and when is it a signal to change paths? Do we always get a negative twinge when we’re on the wrong path? Or is it possible to cling to a limiting belief, feeling like it’s an positive, helpful belief?
Hee hee. Love the tough questions… Hugs!
Hi Mary Carol,
You will ALWAYS get a negative feeling when you’re moving away from what you want. It’s just that sometimes you may not be aware of it, because you’re so used to that feeling. If you’re in discomfort, it’s always a good idea to back off – if you raise your vibration, you’ll get access to clarity, which will help you to see what your next course of action should be. You may need to simply shift perspective a bit, or change course altogether. Either way, backing off can help you to figure that out. I guess I always only have one answer, ultimately: Raise your Vibration, raise your vibration, raise your vibration… 🙂
Hi Melody, thanks fo this excellent post, it´s so full of important information I really need to know!
Negative emotions means our thoughts aren´t serving us means they are just no true – so simple and revealing!
Our personal feedback system dogs us signaling to us the severity of our self abuse. And accidents are the signals for the hardliners amoung us. Or we manifest them as a result of our predomiate focus. And letting go of false beliefs in sufficient time should prevent us from having to learn about their destructive character the hard way.
I think it´s challenging and not alway easy to find the causative belief behind experiences.
Here my current “story”: I experience severe violence for years now (not joking), and I can´t get off this experience, as it seems! I attract the same experience over and over again, many many times (it defies any statistic, I know, extremely creepy), and I had numerous attempts to “stop” it (including all authorites I could think of), unsuccessfully. I know that I didn´t “make it happen”, I didn´t “provoke” anything, I didn´t focus on it. Of course with time I got concerned (I got these traumatizing, extremely painful experiences not just physically; I don´t want to describe the real scenario here), but managed to get positive again and again about the issue – I still manifest these experiences.
I can feel somehow that it has something to do with me vibrationally; I surmise it as my underlying feelings of unsafety and abandonment due to my personal history, but I feel powerless about it. I´m not sure what it is, what beliefs I enterain over and over, which cause these scenarios. I have to find out.
Thanks for this one again! I appreciate very much!:D
Thank you so much for having the courage to share some of your personal story.
It’s definitely not easy to find the vibrational cause when a belief has been with you for a long time. It will feel normal to you and so you may overlook it again and again. In these instances, I definitely recommend getting help – preferably someone who works with energy and has experience helping people dig up beliefs. This can be a therapist, counselor or coach. It makes perfect sense that if you tried to solve this from the outside in (with authority, by taking action), that you’d end up recreating the same situation over and over again. Get to the root cause, though, and it will actually get better. Having said that, if you’re in a dangerous situation now, get out and then do the vibrational work afterwards.
You’ve set a powerful intention to figure this out. The clarity you’re gaining now is part of that solution. Know that you’re well on your way. 🙂
Huge hugs to you,
Hi Melody, thanks for your sympathy! Appreciated!
Things have to evolve in this matter, I don´t know what string to pull at the moment. I´ll have to wait with it!
And no counselor in the world can put herself in my shoes.. (no counselor in the world would actually believe what I have experienced over the last six years now..) 😉
(hope my smiley will work this time..)
You’ll find the right solution. See? Even your smiley worked. Things are looking up already… Ha! Also, you may be surprised what some counselors and coaches will believe and understand…