Today’s post is inspired by another reader question. Anonymous asks: “If someone has an accident, did they make it happen? How can they deal with it and heal from it, without continuing to vibrate it and attracting more?”

Here’s my answer:

First of all, I don’t really like to use phrases like “someone made something happen”. That’s kind of along the lines of saying “it’s your own damn fault”. Those kinds of thoughts never feel good, and since we know that negative emotion signals that whatever we’re thinking isn’t serving us, these kinds of blaming thoughts just aren’t true.

However… everything we experience is a result of our vibration. Everything. And that includes the “accidents”. So what’s the difference between what I just said and claiming that we made it happen? A lot. When you make something happen, it implies that you did something wrong and that you got what you deserved. Even if you didn’t know what you were doing, you still ended up causing your own misery. This is the kind of thinking that leads people to believe that bad things happen in order to teach us a lesson. And, as I’ve already explained in a previous post, that’s just bullshit.

When we look at this from another angle – the one that states that what happens to you is a result of your vibration, we take the blame out of it. We eliminate the idea of punishment and judgment, neither of which feel good. Your experiences are vibrational feedback, plain and simple.

Your vibrational feedback system

Let’s say that you’ve got one of those cars with censors, which let you know when you get too close to other cars or objects. It beeps when you back up and indicates your position by getting louder and faster the closer you get to the car behind you. So, the closer you get to having an experience that doesn’t serve you – crashing into the car behind you – the stronger this indicator gets by beeping faster and louder. This feedback mechanism does not judge you, it does not start screaming at you to STOP ALREADY, YOU FREAKIN’ IDIOT, it does not turn into your mother in law. And if you ignore the feedback and bump into the car behind you, it doesn’t blame you or tell you “I told you so”, nor does it now claim that you deserve whatever repair bill or ticket you’ve got coming to you. YOU may do all of those things, but the computer running these censors and feedback system doesn’t say a word. It’s only function is to provide you with information. What you do with that information is entirely up to you.

Your vibrational feedback system is the same. Your first indication that you’re getting closer to something you don’t want is negative emotion. Ignore that, and your indicator beeps a little louder and faster. Maybe you have a negative experience – someone is rude to you, or you cut your finger. Keep on ignoring the signal and it will keep getting louder – your experiences become harder and harder to ignore until finally something happens that gets your attention. How “bad” that something is depends entirely on your own personal tolerance for suffering and how conditioned you are to the belief that suffering is necessary.

The Real World

But let’s bring this from the theoretical into the “real” world: You’ve got a vibration going on inside you that isn’t serving you. Somewhere along the line, you’ve adopted the belief that the world will stop spinning on its axis and people will just generally disintegrate into incompetent blobs if you don’t make sure everything runs smoothly. You’ve made yourself responsible for everything and everyone in your reality. Now, this thought doesn’t feel good to you (first sign that it’s not serving you), but you’ve also come to believe that sometimes in life, you’ve just got to bite the bullet. You just have to force yourself to suffer for the “greater good”. And so, you keep pushing along, running yourself ragged, picking up everyone’s slack at work, at home and even with strangers. YOU have pretty much stopped mattering completely. You don’t have time to take care of yourself, damn it. You have way too much to do.

Your vibration is shouting “I have so much to do! I have way too much to do!” and “Nothing gets done without me! People are helpless without me!” What do you think you’re going to manifest? More and more incompetent people in your reality who seemingly can’t feed themselves, spell check a report or take a crap without your help, as well as more and more work. The Universe will keep piling it on, it has no choice. It has to bring you more of what matches your current vibration. So, you’ll become ever more overwhelmed, ever busier, and more and more convinced that the world truly needs you to be its safety net. It’s an ugly downward spiral.

Beep!

And all the while, your feedback system, the one designed to let you know when you’re moving in a direction that’s taking you away from what you truly want, is beeping away. You feel stressed, frustrated, maybe even a bit depressed, but that doesn’t really matter. They make a pill for that now. You just keep shoving those emotions away and getting on with business. After all, if you don’t do it all, who the hell will?? You’ve had some negative emotion, but you ignored it. You just keep on activating that belief that isn’t serving you. If your feedback system is going get your attention, it’s going to have to step it up a notch.

Beep! Beep!

So, maybe you get the flu. That should slow you down, give you a chance to think, make you take a nap and allow your vibration to rise a bit (bringing clarity and perspective with it). But no! You don’t have time to be sick or to rest. You take another pill, force yourself to muddle through, even though you’re miserable. Why does God hate you so? Why would he give you the flu when you’ve already got so much on your plate? Why is life so unfair? Well, it’s not God, honey. It’s your feedback system saying “Um, you’re about to crash, yo. Y’all might want to pay attention to that.” But you don’t have time for this crap. You hit the gas and keep on plugging along. No flu or deathly pallor is going to keep you from doing your “job”. You’re made of stronger stuff than that!

BEEPITYBEEPITTYBEEPITY!

Your feedback system keeps on getting louder and faster. Again, it’s not judging you, it’s just giving you information. You’re the one who decided (through life experience and determining what you like and don’t like) what goals you ultimately consider to be desirable and which ones you want to stay away from. Your feedback system is letting you know that you are moving in a direction that YOU determined, at some point, to be something you don’t want. It’s telling you “Look, you said that you wanted a life of ease, of passion, of happiness and joy, but what you’re moving towards, what you’re focusing on, is taking you away from that. Just thought you’d want to know.”

Your feedback system will never stop escalating its message, as long as you keep focusing on something that’s taking you away from what you want. It will never leave you, it will never let you down and it will never break. You’ll always have a chance to hear it, and you always will. Eventually.

So, if you keep on ignoring the signals you’re getting, you may find yourself driving down the road one day, overwhelmed, distracted, near to a nervous breakdown, and you get into an accident. You end up in the hospital with a broken leg. You can’t believe it. What will everyone do without you? How will they survive? Why hasn’t WWIII broken out yet? Surely the governments of the world will crumble without you holding the strings of reality together… No? What’s that? People are figuring it out? Your husband did NOT forget to feed the kids or drop them down the garbage disposal? Your boss managed to get through some meetings without you? Perhaps a few things were rocky during the adjustment period. You’ve trained people pretty well to be completely dependent on you, but they’re finding their way during your forced absence. It slowly starts to dawn on you that you were the one who decided to take on all this responsibility. You were the one that assumed that no one could get along without you. You were the one who was running yourself ragged. And you begin to realize that you were wrong. No one was holding a gun to your head, even though it sometimes felt like it.

Your feedback system created a situation “loud” enough to get your attention. Now, this doesn’t have to be an accident. Manifestations are extremely personal and always perfectly tailored to the individual. A great many people will ignore their feedback system until it creates so much suffering that they finally just give up. They cry “I can’t take it anymore. I don’t care what happens, but I can’t do this anymore.” And then they let go of all those false beliefs and they gain a different perspective, one that feels a hell of a lot better. Accidents, illnesses and traumatizing experiences are all essentially the same thing – massive indicators of vibrational discord.

Can you create an accident?

Most people who have accidents do so for the reason I just explained. But, it’s also possible to focus so vehemently on accidents, by being afraid of having one, that you could, in fact, manifest having one. This takes much more than a fleeting thought here and there, though. You’d have to have a pretty strong fear and activate it often to bring this kind of event about. Usually, our negative manifestations can’t be taken quite that literally (cancer is rarely created by a fear of cancer.) You have to dig a little deeper.

What does it all mean?

So, what if you’ve had an accident? What should you do then? Well, first, don’t beat up on yourself. Don’t obsess over what feedback you may have missed. Allow it to play out. If you’ve been hurt and that will force you to rest, TAKE THE REST. This is the most valuable thing you can do. Take a step back and give yourself some time. Accidents are generally a great way to stop people in their tracks, giving them time and opportunity to evaluate their current vibration and perspective. Sometimes even just a near accident can have the desired effect. It gets you to STOP and THINK, something you may not have taken the time to do for a very long time. Take that opportunity.

Can you prevent accidents?

Yes and no. Worrying about having an accident isn’t going to serve you (notice that it doesn’t feel good?). But if you get good at paying attention to your vibrational feedback system, and shifting your vibration and perspective when you’re in the negative emotion stage, then you’ll have much fewer physical manifestations of those limiting beliefs. Will they ever go away completely? No. And you don’t want them to. Physical manifestations of limiting beliefs will definitely get less severe (more rude people, less accidents) as you notice them faster, but watching as other people mirror your beliefs back to you, playing this game with those around you, is part of the fun of life. And your response to these events may change drastically. For example, you may meet someone who turns out to be an absolute dick to you. But after some contemplation, instead of just deciding this must be a horrible person, you realize that they were showing you something very valuable about yourself in a detailed and utterly perfect way – one which you could not miss. You uncover a specific belief and shift it, leaving you happier, lighter and freer than you were before. You end up being grateful to this person who acted like a dick, for being willing to play the game with you and for showing you something you needed to see. Over time, “negative” events become powerful and sometimes even fun opportunities for growth.

Now it’s your turn: Have you had an accident? Looking back, can you see how it may actually have served you? Did it stop you in your tracks and help you make a valuable change?