Awesome Mikayla’s Burning Question: “Can LOA work for teenagers? I am trying to manifest my perfect life now at the age of 17, which I know is young but I don’t know if this can work for me! Like most teenagers, I want freedom and to experience things I haven’t experienced but how can I do that when I’m surrounded by unhappiness in high school and I have to rely on my mom for money and rides since I don’t have a car! I want to feel independent and start my adult life off right…how can I align with what I want so that I will have an abundant adult life and to help me be successful in this huge shift from being a child to “the real world?” Please help me!”
Dear Awesome Mikayla,
First of all, the Law of Attraction isn’t ageist. You don’t get a license to practice LOA when you’re 21. You, and everything else, are subject to the LOA, no matter if you’re aware of it or not. You wouldn’t ask if gravity will work for someone your age, would you?
But I get your question. What you’re really asking is can you do this work deliberately (as in deliberately receive your reality) at your age? And the answer is, of course you can! A five year old can do this deliberately! In fact, the younger you are, the easier it will tend to be for you. You haven’t gathered as much evidence to support your negative beliefs as some of us oldies have (although I would refrain from maybe pointing that out to any oldies. We can be a grumpy bunch).
I’m happy to give you some insights tailored to you and this important time in your life, though. But I must warn you. I talk to teenagers the way I talk to everyone else. That means cursing, no bullshit allowed, and I’m not dumbing this crap down. The way I see it, doing anything less would be incredibly condescending and disrespectful to you. Plus, it wouldn’t be nearly as much fun for me, so…
Why it sucks being a teenager
I won’t lie to you. I’m not going to sit here and tell you that these are the best years of your life. The only adults that do that have very unhappy lives. I mean seriously, if high school was the highlight of your life, you’re doing something wrong.
Being a teenager can totally suck. Here are just a few reasons why:
- High School. I’ve written about our education system before, so my opinion on this isn’t exactly a secret. You’re being trained to be a good little worker, discouraged from thinking for yourself, and being sold a very narrow path to success, that doesn’t actually lead to any kind of monetary OR emotional well-being. If you find yourself thinking that this is mostly a huge waste of time, you’re totally right. It is. But once you’re in the system, you kind of have to go with it (I’ll show you later how you can turn this into a good thing).
- Hormones. They go crazy during this time of your development, which can cause acne, mood swings, and embarrassing outbursts. At no other time in your life will you have that little control over your body or emotions. Obviously, infants have it even worse, but they don’t really care, so in my book, you’re more screwed.
- Adults don’t take you seriously. Of course, there are exceptions, but in our society as a whole, we give very little respect to children and teenagers. Not only do we not consider your opinions valid (as if you’re too stupid to know what you want and what you don’t want), we minimize and dismiss your pain. What many adults don’t consider is that your perspective is a lot smaller when you’re younger, so everything that happens to you, impacts your whole world. When a boy breaks your heart, you don’t know that not all boys are like that, or that there are plenty of fish in the sea. You haven’t yet had the experiences that will teach you that (and no, you can’t just be told by an adult). When your best friend betrays you, it shatters everything you know about friendship and makes you feel unsafe in general. You cannot just get over something like that. You have to process it, the same as any huge trauma (adults, think of it this way: your boyfriend of three months leaving you at 16 feels the same as your husband of twenty years leaving you for a stripper.) It’s not your imagination that many people don’t understand you. Many of them really don’t.
- You have very little power to make your own decisions. As you pointed out, you don’t have your own car. You don’t have the ability to move out on your own and live completely independently. There are many things that are not legally open to you yet. If you have really controlling (i.e. strict) parents, who are making you responsible for their own fears (parents, you know who you are!), it gets even worse. You may have to live by rules that make no sense to you, conform to norms that make you want to run off screaming, and be told by others who clearly don’t have their own shit together that they know what’s best for you better than you do (which is, quite frankly, ridiculous).
So yeah, being a teenager can totally suck. If you choose to look at it that way. You see, while there are restrictions, they aren’t really any different from the restrictions that most adults live in, in the “real world”, as you put it. Where you have your parents telling you what to do, adults have idiot bosses who think they know everything. Where you have school forcing you to do work that doesn’t matter, adults have corporate jobs that are sucking their souls dry every day. You may feel limited by your surroundings, but so do adults. There are laws and rules and societal norms to adhere to, most of which make no logical sense.
And while your lack of emotional stability can be blamed on your age or hormones, let me assure you that most adults alive today don’t have a whole lot more skill in navigating their feelings than you do. Why do you think they’re so keen to remember their teenage years as better? Because the idea that their problems have gotten a lot worse feels so much better than the realization that they haven’t learned a damn thing about how to navigate the world since their teens.
Being a teenager can totally suck, that’s true. But so can being an adult. The good news is that none of it has to, not for you, and not for us oldies. Wanna know how to make it not suck? Course you do.
You’re not a child anymore
The first bit of validation I want to give you is that, no matter what the adults around you might say, you are not a child anymore at 17. There’s no magic shift that happens on your 18th birthday that suddenly makes you an adult. In fact, it’s quite difficult to define what makes someone an adult. Many people in their 30’s and 40’s (and beyond!) still don’t feel like they’re grown up and some of us never will (although, to be fair, being and adult and being grown up aren’t necessarily the same thing…). Some would say that adulthood connotes an ability to handle a certain amount of responsibility. But there are a ton of adults who can’t do that. One might argue that adulthood comes with sound judgment. Again, all one would have to do is go and look on the internet (“People of Walmart” comes to mind…) to disprove that theory.
To me, you’re an adult when you go out on your own, when you take responsibility for yourself and your own life, and you make your own decisions. Childhood is that magical time when you leave most of that stuff up to others and happily so. The teenage years are that weird and wacky time in between, where you have the ability to make those adult decisions (you have the ability to understand how to), and you certainly have the desire to, but you don’t yet possess the skill. To me, that’s what the teenage years are all about – practicing how to be an adult in a safe environment, where the stakes aren’t as high and the risks aren’t as big.
Why your parents suddenly seem like idiots
For the first 6-7 years of our lives, we are like sponges. We soak up anything and everything that’s presented to us. When we’re told how the world works, we tend to accept that almost unquestioningly, unless what we’re told is just complete and utter bullshit. You may have noticed that the little kids today accept less and less of the BS readily. Their nonsense meters are more highly tuned than any other generation before them.
The time after seven years of age, our main core beliefs are pretty much set and we use these years to solidify them. This is when we stop believing in magic, parrot a lot of what our parents say and begin to differentiate our own tribe from others. What our parents say is pretty much infallible. If anyone is going to be wrong, it will be the other kids’ parents. We’ve firmly taken on the false belief that our tribe is right, and only our tribe is right.
As we enter our teenage years, we naturally begin to question everything, including anything and everything our parents have told us. We begin the process of differentiating ourselves from our tribe and finding our own, personal identity. How can we make our own decisions if we don’t first throw out everything we’ve been taught? It’s at this time that our parents seem to turn into idiots. They’re still trying to tell us how it is from their perspective, but we want to develop our own. The more they push us to accept their point of view, the more we push back.
This is a natural phenomenon. If you’re a parent currently locked into a power struggle with your teen, do the counterintuitive thing and back off. Give them space. Stop trying to tell them who you think they are and let them figure it out. You’ll get a lot less push back that way.
If this process is stunted, if the home environment is so controlling that the teenager’s own identity isn’t allowed it emerge, they’ll then have to spend their 20’s and 30’s figuring out who they are. Now normally, these years and all the ones beyond are a continuation of the process that begins in our teens, but it’s a lot more comfortable to start the process of self-identification in a safe environment.
What our teenage years are good for
If allowed to unfold naturally, the teenage years can be an incredible time of self-realization and growth, both for the teenagers and their parents.
During our teenage years:
- We learn how to make decisions, while still having access to our parents’ guidance. In order to practice this successfully, however, we have to be allowed to make actual, real life decisions that have actual, real life consequences. In short, if we’re not allowed to make a bad decision, we won’t learn how.
- We learn how to exercise judgment. This is closely aligned with making decisions, as sound judgment is needed to make good decisions. We learn how to figure out what we want and what we don’t want, and how to evaluate which option is most likely to lead to our goal. If parents step in and tell us what to decide, if they exercise judgment for us, we’ll have less ability to learn it for ourselves. Because judgment can’t be mimicked. It has to be developed through practice.
- We learn about our preferences. This is what most people will call our “identity”. We learn what we like and don’t like, who we want to be and how we want to fit into the world. We begin to discover who we are, often by first figuring out who we are not. And yes, this process usually starts by us looking at our parents and declaring that we don’t want to be like them (many people are still declaring this decades later…)
- We question everything. As well we freaking should. A lot of the rules that our society applies are, to put it bluntly, complete and utter bullshit. And what’s more, we totally know it, if we’re honest. As teenagers, we rebel against these arbitrary, useless rules of life, most of which are based on appeasing other people. The answer clearly isn’t to just capitulate and conform. But the answer is also not to rebel and use all your energy to push against the crappy system you don’t want to be a part of.
The more we are allowed to practice our independence, to make our own decisions and exercise judgment, the more we are permitted to make mistakes and experience the real consequences of our actions (being punished is not a real consequence, it’s an attempt to control), the more emotionally stable we will be as “adults”. The more controlling our environment during these years, the more we’ll go crazy the first chance we get to leave the nest (have you ever seen college freshmen go absolutely crazy as soon as they leave home?).
But this post isn’t specifically for parents (although I know the parents will be reading and benefiting from this). It’s for the teens. What can you do, no matter what environment you’re living in (more or less controlling) to begin the process of deliberately receiving your reality?
Stop pushing against your parents
Yes, your parents might seem like idiots (I already explained why), but they’re not. They, just like you, are doing the best they can. They, just like you, are fallible. They, just like you, are still figuring it out. It will actually do you both good to remember that (parents holding themselves to a standard of perfection freak out the most).
The one thing you want to remember is that they love you, and they feel a responsibility for your safety and well-being that you may not fully understand until you’re a parent yourself. They can’t just leave you alone. They can’t just stop worrying about you. Believe me, they often wish they could. They’re not worried about you because they think you’re such a screw up. They’re worried about you because part of them still sees you as that little helpless baby. They’re scared to death every time you leave the house that something will happen to you. Your pain is their pain, and when you hurt and they have no idea how to fix it, it tears them apart. That’s why they sometimes act so weird, even getting mad at you for something that has caused you pain. They feel powerless to make it better, to protect you against all the possible dangers of the world. This is also why they try to control you – they figure it’s the only way to keep you safe.
No, none of this is your fault or even fair to you. But it does help if you remember that your parents aren’t being assholes. They’re scared. All. The. Time. If you remember this when you’re dealing with your parents, if you don’t deliberately trigger their fear but aim to soothe it in your approach, you’ll get a lot less push back from them (because it isn’t just up to them to cater to you. You can also meet them half way). For example, if you acknowledge and address their fears as you talk to them, (“I realize you’re worried about me driving and I know that it can be dangerous, but I also believe that I’m a very safe driver. I pay attention. I’m aware of other drivers and I am responsible, and I feel that the more practice I get, the better driver I’ll become.”), you’ll have a much better chance of having an actual dialogue with them rather than a screaming match.
Remember that, from an LOA point of view, whatever you push against, you get more of. So, if you insist that your parents are just stupid and brain dead and that things won’t change until you move out, that’s exactly what you’ll get more of. Good luck with that. Adopt the mindset that when your parents freak out, they’re just scared and do your best to have compassion for them.
Don’t wait until you move out to be free
Don’t see your move out date as a kind of release from prison. I get it, it’s harder to exercise your independence while you’re still living at home. But you know what? A lot of adults would argue that it’s nearly impossible to exercise independence while in an office job, or if you have kids, or if you don’t earn more than a certain amount of money, or if you have elderly parents to care for, or a horrible mother in law, or whatever. You can put yourself in prison at any age and for any reason. These are all just excuses to feel limitation.
If you decide that you won’t have any freedom until you’re 18, you won’t. But it won’t be anyone’s doing but yours. And this is where the valuable lesson for you lies – if you can learn to feel free in what seems like a restrictive environment, if you can exercise that power now, you will set yourself up for a lifetime of freedom. If you buy into the idea that your freedom is tied to other people on the other hand, if you give your power away, you’ll be volunteering for a life of slavery.
It isn’t up to your parents to grant you your freedom, no matter what it seems like. You can manifest a different version of your parents, one that isn’t as controlling, for example, any time. Not pushing against them is a good start. Here are a few more tips that will help you align with this new vibration:
- Focus on and celebrate the decisions you can make, instead of the ones you can’t. Every decision you can make represents a little freedom. Talk about what you’re allowed to do, rather than what’s forbidden. And yes, I understand that this won’t be easy. But this is how you change your energy.
- Become aware of your preferences. Even if your parents are making a decision, you can still become aware of what you would’ve preferred and why. This is an exercise in self-awareness, and something that a lot of adults still struggle with. It’s easy to bitch about what you don’t want. It’s a bit more work but infinitely more valuable to figure out what you want instead and why (and keep in mind that the why can’t be to piss everyone off. You’re going to have to dig deeper than that). Your true WHY will take all the other people out of the equation. It will feel right to you. It will require that you get still and check in with how you truly feel. It means acknowledging your emotions. This is the self-work that all of my adult clients are doing, and it will work just as well for you.
- Use your imagination. Focus on what you want, even if it’s not currently in your reality. This is what your imagination is for. As you do this, generate the feeling that you want this thing to give you. You have to be willing to emanate the feeling first, before what that feeling represents can come into your life. And don’t be afraid to dream big. If you knew what you were truly capable of achieving, you’d never limit yourself in any way.
- Don’t focus on the HOW. There will be a lot of things that you want that you have no idea how to get. There will be things you want that you’re convinced can’t happen. “My mom will say no”, is something that shuts down a lot of dreams. Take your mom and everyone else out of the equation. Forget about HOW you’ll get what you want. Just focus on what you want and let it feel good to you. You’ll be surprised by how the Universe can line up things you thought were impossible if you just let go of trying to figure out the HOW.
Stop trying to get anyone’s validation
Again, this skill will come in handy for the rest of your life. You may notice that all of the techniques I’ve mentioned so far have been ones that you can do inside your own head. They don’t require you to talk to anyone or argue with anyone. And they don’t require you to get anyone’s approval or validation. When you share your big dreams with people, for example, it’s generally going to be in the hopes of them agreeing that yes, you can totally accomplish this thing. You’re hoping that they’ll soothe your doubts. What will usually happen, however, is that they’ll mirror your doubts back to you, by picking your dream apart until there’s nothing left but a few pitiful scraps.
Own your dreams. Take responsibility for them. Protect them. And believe in them. Know that your dreams probably threaten a lot of people around you, people that have decided to settle for something less than they wanted, out of a belief that it was safer to do so. These people will be triggered by your passion – their own fears will surface, and they’ll have two choices. They can admit that they didn’t follow their dreams because they were too scared (this, in itself is scary), or they can just shut down your dream. Because believing that no one can follow their passion is often easier than poking at and acknowledging our own fears. But you don’t have to subject yourself to their fears. Keep your dreams to yourself and only share them with others if you know they’ll be supportive, and if and when you’re ready to. Those who can’t believe in you now, because they can’t believe in themselves, will come around once you’ve been successful. In fact, then they’ll claim that they always knew you could do it and will become your biggest fans.
Do not let other people’s fears shut down your dreams. But you don’t have to convince them to drop their fears in order to do this. Just ignore their fears and do the work in your head. This is where your true power is, anyway.
Learn to communicate authentically
Learning how to talk to people so that they’ll actually hear you is one of the most valuable skills you can acquire. Being authentic will not only feel a lot better, but it will shut down all the drama in your life. It’s also one of the hardest skills on this list to learn.
What is authentic communication? Well, in a nutshell, it’s learning to communicate what you truly want and how you truly feel. It means taking all the defensive barriers down and just being “real”. It means responding to every question, every remark, completely honestly. Scary? Hell yes. But worth it. Trust me on that.
Let me give you an example: Let’s say your mom decides to tell you that you can’t go to the movies on Friday night because you didn’t do your homework, which you think it totally unfair (I would agree with you, but don’t tell your mom). If you take a beat and think about why it’s unfair, you might discover what you actually think and why you think it. For example, you might figure out that you don’t understand why your mom is mad about your homework, since it doesn’t actually affect her. You might remember that awesome blog post that explained to you that she’s scared for you. Punishing you is her attempt to force you to do something that she believes is good for you (never mind that humans don’t need incentives to do what they believe is good for them, only to do what others believe is good for them).
Then, and this is the hard part, you’ll want to ask yourself why you really didn’t do your homework. You had a reason to blow it off (and don’t stop at “It’s stupid.”). Is it difficult? Or are you bored? Do you truly feel that it’s an exercise in futility (you’re not learning anything)? If so, are you pushing against the whole school system in a passive aggressive attempt at rebellion (you will not change the system by not doing your homework). Whatever the true reason is, is there something that would help alleviate it? For example, if the exercises are too hard or you don’t understand the class, can you get help? Yes, this would entail admitting that you’re having trouble, but we’re being authentic, remember?
If you’re bored, could you talk to your teacher about doing more advanced work instead? Perhaps your mom can help you. What is it that you really wanted to accomplish by not doing your homework? Do you think simply not complying will give you that? Or is there a better way? If, for example, you feel that the class you’re taking is useless to you, can you ask your teacher (nicely and respectfully) to maybe do a lesson on why this subject matter is relevant? Can you do that research yourself (challenge accepted!) and do a presentation for the class (can you say, extra credit?)? You can also read this post on how to make school work more fun for yourself and others.
Be willing to identify the real problem. Even if you hate the class because your stupid ex is in it, there’s a solution out there that doesn’t require you to have a fight with your mom. In fact, holding her responsible for whatever the real issue is will keep you from figuring it out. Look deeper and take your mom’s reaction out of the equation.
Then, once you’ve figured out what the real issue is, and therefore have identified what you truly want (this goal will feel really good to you. If it doesn’t, keep working on it), you may want to talk it out with your mom, if you have that kind of relationship. You may be very surprised by her reaction when you approach her authentically instead of with a bunch of sarcastic comments meant to convey your utter disapproval of her.
Bottom line
I realize that I may have stretched the limits of a teenager’s attention span here (this has turned into one of the longest posts I’ve ever written), but I also know that if something is important to you, your focus will keep up with you. Or, you can always print it out and read it on the toilet. Ha.
The bottom line here is that you can deliberately practice the Law of Attraction at any age. The skills you learn as a teenager can give you a huge head start and serve you for the rest of your life. The really, really good news is that if you implement even just one of these techniques (and I don’t suggest you try to tackle them all at once), you’ll see tangible results fast. And remember, the goal is not to somehow remove yourself from reality and then create what you want. That doesn’t take much skill. It’s to create your reality deliberately amidst all the chaos and limitation. Because that’s true power. You are a master creator and masters don’t choose easy challenges. You chose be born into this labyrinth of limitation on purpose, because you knew that you could find the beauty and freedom within it.
You have no idea how powerful you are and what tremendous awesomeness you’re capable of. But if you’re studying this work at 17, you’re certainly well on your way to figuring it out.
I’ve been aware of the LOA since I was 14 (21 now) and have been studying it and other personal development material ever since. Still, I haven’t been able to manifest the things I most want, the dreams within my heart. I’m coming to the point where I feel like I will just have to resign myself to accepting something less, something less grand, and that what I want is just not going to happen, not realistic, etc. It feels terrible to just “accept” something that isn’t what I want and try to be content with that when I know inside it’s not true.
I’ve also read all this stuff about accepting and releasing attachment, stop wanting things so much…but I can never seem to stop wanting what I want because the desire and dream comes from such a deep place within. It’s still so difficult for me to trust the universe. I’m extremely desperate now and reality seems to be slapping me in the face, there seems to be no way to get what I want from here. Also that I’m too old now to get what I want, do have the opportunity to do what I want and that feels terrible and untrue but I feel like I just have to accept it.
I’ve tried all the techniques…ladder technique, meditation, visualisation, positive thinking, being present, doing things that feel good, affirmations, reaching for a better feeling thought, asking for help, gratitude, journaling, writing things down, taking inspired action, asking “why”, coaching session, etc. I will say how I truly feel instead of lying and saying something positive…I feel like my resistance is too great and perhaps what I want just wouldn’t be good for me or isn’t meant to happen in this lifetime. Nothing has worked and I am still no where near where I want to be.
How do you accept that your desires are not possible or that it’s unlikely for them to come to pass on this earthly plane? How do you change what you are wanting and stop living with hope and dreaming? Accept that you aren’t going to get what you want and find another dream when something inside cannot stop dreaming and thinking about it?
Melody!!!!! Much gratitude for this! I literally googled LOA for teenagers a week ago when I was desperate to reach my little sister. I’m sooo grateful. Thanks!!!
The thing to remember is that parents are your Earthly guardians, but your “real” parent is Source! It’s Source that doles out the abundance and arranges a way for you to get to the movies. Make sure to ask the right parent, Mikayla. 🙂
The circumstances described in this blog are a vibration that one is in tune with. Restrictive parents, unfulfilling school experiences, difficulty getting from point A to point B, etc. If Mikayla deliberately practices the feelings that are at the core of what she wants, her external reality should shift to give her a more satisfying teenage experience!
thank you for your comment! It really changed the way I was feeling at the current moment. Here I was, just worried about if I would be able to go to homecoming because of my mom and I saw your comment and I feel so great now! I’m definitely feeling great about life now and knowing that I can ask Source for anything and now I know I can have a great last year of high school! Thank you! 🙂
Hi Mikayla,
Wow to you knowing and being open to LOA in your teens. Melody is right in saying for many of us the “real world” of adulthood, it can feel just as restrictive as the world of the teen. ….Just substitute bosses for parents, jobs for school and a whole lot of “homework” chores like filing tax and the like…. anyway…
I got a twinge to reply when you mentioned homecoming. This is something your mom may have a whole lot of personal “stuff” around, and this event in your life may bring a lot of her stuff to the surface. How about now – well before your homecoming – you ask her about hers. Really listen. Then focus on getting her to partner with you to make your homecoming special for you. Homecoming has been a tortuous rite of passage for many generations now. But you can use what you already know of LOA to make your homecoming everything YOU want it to be.
Hey there!
First of all thank you, I am very grateful to have first learned about the Law of attraction in 8th grade and I’m glad I know about it so early! 🙂 thank you for your comment!
Secondly, that’s a great idea! If I’m correct though, my mom never went to homecoming. She allowed me to go last year, but the only thing I’m “worried” about really is since I don’t have my own job to make money( yet 🙂 ), I’m not sure how I would pay for the ticket, my dress I have found and shoes and other things! I am relying on the universe for this though because I know all I must do is line up with it, feel good and it’ll come. Thank you!
what a gift Melody thankyou. The teenage years have arrived in our house and so it’s feeling really relevant and your guidance is as always so so enlightening and exciting. Could this be a chapter for your book me thinks!! ! I’m imagining my daughter and other teenagers listening to you on an audio!! 🙂 !! Love Bernie x
This is another amazing post Melody! And good that I’m only 22! Just having some more clarity then in my teenage years, but still “having” to use your guidelines for dealing with parents xD. And I really felt a rush of happiness, freedom and empowerment reading this 🙂
I sent this link to both of my teenagers. I would love to read a similar post from the other perspective — helping our kids (of all ages) learn how to receive deliberately. Thank you, Melody!
Hello Judy:
I have read your comment and it made a certain blog post already written here a while ago pop into my head.
teaching the Law of Attraction to children
Hope this answers your question.
Hey Melody
Wow, if I had been aware of LOA when I was a teenager, I wonder what path that would have led me down–would have avoided a lot of crap that is for sure. But, alas, I imagine we all get on our path at the moment we are supposed to. If this person is already considering this stuff now, amazing. Like you said, there has been less time to formulate really negative, limiting beliefs that can really trip us up. The slate has not been quite as sullied yet.
But, as usual your posts contain golden nuggets that are helpful for anyone, regardless if the topic at hand is personally relevant. There is some good stuff in here for people of all ages, particularly since a lot of our thought patterns and behaviors may be the same as when we were teens!
I was thinking the same thing Kelli. Oh what life would be like had I known about LOA at 17. It would be VERY different, that’s for sure. I’m pretty sure I’d be a billionaire by now.
But my life is beginning to head in the direction I want it to go now, so it’s all good. 😉
I’ll be very interested to see what type of teen my 5 year old becomes. He’ll be growing up with parents who teach him this stuff from the beginning – or don’t train him out of it actually. So it’ll be exciting to see what life path he chooses for himself. Right now, he wants to be a monster truck driver. LOL! I tell him he’s gonna be the best monster truck driver there ever was. 🙂
Hey Summer
Like you, things are just getting better for me, and I am getting better at not lamenting I didn’t do certain things sooner.
In all seriousness, your son is really lucky to have parents like that and it will literally make all the difference in the world. My fiance and I were just talking about that the other day. Most people are not raised by people who live by this stuff and after years and years of taking it all in, getting rid of it can be tough. That is what makes working with LOA difficult at times, not the actual process itself–that couldn’t be any simpler. Just feel good, that’s it!
Great post Melody. I wish I had read something like this when I was 17 (a loooooong time ago) and I will be sure to remember these points when my kids are teenagers in a few years (I already get the bit about being Scared. All. The. Time.!!)
Awesome post, Melody! I am going to read this one several times.
This is exactly what I’ve been needing. I’m 18, graduating from college in October and lately I’ve been feeling so restricted at home these days. I’ve been trying to keep a gratitude journal to help deal with my anger and feelings of powerlessness but I will definitely be implementing everything else that was suggested.
Whenever I imagine freedom though, I usually see myself in the far future, living on my own, starting up my business, about to publish my first book. I wonder if I’m focusing too far into the future though.
Hey Dani,
First, having anger and feeling powerless is okay. They are valid feelings, and do not need to be judged as inferior or less than to positive emotions. I’m not saying you do do that, just a reminder that even though you do not prefer them, they are still valid to feel.
Freedom, from my perspective, is being able to choose how you want to feel regardless of your circumstances.
Remember, when you make your freedom dependent on your conditions, then you can cause yourself to wait for the conditions to change, before you allow yourself to feel free. And when you wait for your circumstances to be different before you feel different, you keep your thoughts and vibration based on what-is, and so what-is cannot change to what you want.
You can feel free now, if you want to. It will take some focus and guiding yourself up the Emotional Guidance Scale (from pg. 114 in “Ask and It Is Given” by Esther and Jerry Hicks), but you can do it.
And, you don’t need to jump from powerlessness and anger all the way up to joy and empowerment. You just want to find relief from where you are right now, and focus on feeling a little bit better.
In every moment, you always have the choice to feel a little bit worse or a little bit better. And, the more you focus on, “In this moment, I am focusing on feeling a little better.” the easier it will be to feel better, and feel more freedom and empowerment now (since you are the one in control of your alignment).
What’s something you can focus on and/or do, that feels good and feels a little more freeing, that you can do now?